From “Ted Lasso” to “Too Aggressive”—All in a Day

Let’s talk about one of the biggest emotional traps in sales—especially for women: The need to be liked.

We’re taught—sometimes subtly, sometimes loudly—that likability is the key to success. That if we’re warm enough, agreeable enough, easy enough…We’ll win the deal, earn the respect, get the yes.

And when someone loves us?

We ride that high.

When someone doesn’t?

We internalize it: What did I do wrong?

But here’s the truth: Getting caught in that loop will drain you.

I was reminded of this recently after leading a group sales training.

I showed up fully—as I always do—with energy, strategy, and heart.

The next day, I had a series of 1:1 follow-up meetings with attendees.

One person told me I reminded them of Ted Lasso. (Quite possibly the highest compliment I’ve ever received.)

Another said they respected the content… but found me personally too aggressive. Even borderline disrespectful.

Same training. Same delivery. Two wildly different reactions.

I’ll be honest—I spiraled.

For a moment, I questioned everything:

Did I come on too strong? Should I tone it down? Should I change how I lead?

But then a deeper truth clicked:

Neither reaction was really about me.

The rave review? Not about me.

The criticism? Also not about me.

Both were filtered through the stories, experiences, and beliefs those individuals brought into the room.

Same me. Different lenses.

And it reminded me of something I come back to again and again—in both sales and life:

You can’t control how people experience you. You can only stay grounded in your intention.

Mine? To help people confidently thrive in sales—without fluff, fear, or performance.

Not everyone will love my style.

But if I shape-shift to please every personality in the room?I dilute the very thing that makes my work powerful.

So if you’ve ever walked out of a room wondering,

“Was I too much?”

Or left on a high—only to later question if it was real…

Let me offer you this:

✨ You are not the praise.

✨ You are not the criticism.

✨ You are the intention you brought into the room.

Celebrate the kind words. Reflect on the tough ones. But don’t let either become your truth.

You’re not here to perform for approval. You’re here to make an impact—with heart, with skill, and with integrity.

Stay rooted in that.

That’s your power.